Goals for the New Year

First of all before you say “oh God she’s already beginning with the new year’s resolution crap”. We’re not starting that. No leave it at front door before you click on this blog post.

This is not a post where I talk about making New Year’s Resolutions. No, but it is a blog post where I talk about preparing for 2018. Yes I’m putting on my armor, 2018 is soon to come crashing in. Frankly I would be rather upset if my hair caught on fire in the process. Ah needless to say, we need to prepare because coming to 2018 is the see ya and the bye ya to procrastination and negativity. It’s all in good thought, because I know some habits are a never ending battle to break. BUT, I’m not the type to give up.

So we’re going to grab onto 2018 with our resting bitch face, and hold on as it drags us through stress, new experiences ,and lots of other muck. By the end, maybe a smile will be permanently stuck on.  Ah who knows.

2018 is as quickly approaching as 2017 is to be ending. 2017 has not been a good year. I know for myself it’s been a bad enough year that I don’t need to repeat it. I’ve got to work my butt off to make sure that 2017 stays in the past.

I know they say it’s bad to tell people your goals, but this is a judgement free zone. I know that stating my goals forces me to uphold them.

My goal for 2018 are normal and a little weird. First off I want to get healthy. I have not been myself, and that needs to change. I want to get on a more positive attitude, and try not to procrastinate as much. The next thing that I would like to do is publish at least two books. I have a book hopefully coming out around in March. After that, don’t ask me. I would like to continue to build my author brand more and see where I can take my book sales.

I don’t have a lot for 2018 as I am doing this thing where I stop talking and actually get work done.

Enough said.

To prepare for 2018, I am grabbing my computer, planner, and favorite boots.

I’m going into 2018 prepared, with all words flying.

Life Stories 

So I’ve been thinking lately. It’s the holidays, it’s cold out and I need a healthy dose of humor.

Therefore, I’m starting up another theme-esque exercise. Except it’s entirely different. Though I will get back to theme. Eventually.

This new post happiness comes with a disclaimer. Nobody panic.

DISCLAIMER: This is not an exercise that involves me running around town in a Disney Costume, singing at the top of my lungs. That would be well, a bit excessive.

If you were looking forward to that possibility, I have just crushed your dreams. But you’re still going to get some humor!

What I am going to do is document my day to day life. I’m entirely sarcastic but it’s okay.

Anyway I will be throwing my “life stories” at ya’ll (me mocking my twang that lately people have told me is there).

Stress Management

Oh dear, where do I begin?

This was my thought as I sat in my bed at 3 AM stuffing my face with ice cream. 

After two five page papers and two presentations, this scaredy cat is tapped out. College sucks, but you know I’m surviving. 

So I’ve been pondering a question for a while. How do I manage my own stress? 

The answer: Writing. 

Then ask myself, doesn’t writing stress you out? Because the book you threw at your computer in frustration last night is still on your computer.

Me managing my stress is going outside finding some quiet place in the woods to just sit. 

Us sensitive souls need an escape from humanity. 

The woods is the only place that is untouched from stress. Its devoid of any humans, I am free to think the way that I want. 

That solitude is entirely mind restoring. 20 minutes that’s all I need. 

Traveler

All I have ever wanted to do is see the world.

To live life, always going one hundred miles per hour. Never stopping to get caught up in all the bullshit that accumulates within our lives.

The other day someone said to me, “I think that’s everyone’s goal. To travel the world. To forget their responsibilities. To live the fairy tale that was shoved down their throat as a kid.”

I don’t disagree. I look at people who travel all over the world. Some are happy and carefree, they have this air to a lack of responsibility. You think Gosh I wish I was them. 

Whereas if you know a few travelers some are so enamored by their “occupation” that they compel this almost sort of arrogance. But some, they are repulsed. They don’t see going to other places an exhilarating experience. It’s like traveling is a festering sore to them. Each time they go, that sore is expected to pop.

Every person is different. Some are the born traveler and some are not. Everyone has a different view and that’s okay.

I have wanted to be a traveler because like in my writing, exploring a new place is like magic. You never forget the first time you go to a new place. It’s not the same a second time.

I think that is what being a traveler is, feeling the thrill in exploration, like the thrill of imagination.

My mind is spontaneous, and I have always wanted traveling to be that way. Maybe it’s time I get out of the house. Run to the mountains or something.

Going for the Gold

“Tonight is the night!” I exclaim.

I finally got my writer head together. I’ve been in a weird mind set for a while. I don’t know how long. Four maybe five years. For this long time I’ve been trying to find myself again.

After a solid week of focusing on myself, I think I’ve finally met that personal goal. It’s not even December and I’m making resolutions for the new year. I know who I am now and I know what I am meant to do.

I think every writer/creative individual goes through this phase, but I am tired of going through this phase. It’s time I get it together and go for the gold.

Life is life. It can be crappy yeah, but without the right mindset. It can wreck your dreams before you ever realize it.

Don’t start tomorrow, don’t start a week from now. Start tonight. Forget your inhibitions. Erase your insecurities. Push out all the people who keep dragging you back to the place you don’t want to be.

It’s hard to drop everything and move on, but this is the only life you have to live. Time passes quickly. When tomorrow comes, you’ll wish you had changed your life yesterday. So I’m telling you as I have told myself. Start right now.

The road to unhappiness is paved by all the things in life you fear. Stop fearing, get up. Finish that novel, go on an adventure, sell your house, move across the country. Go back to school. Do what makes you happy.

The things we want most in life, are often the hardest to reach.

A New Dusk

Day one of a new beginning is ending. I am me, but my goals are different and so is my outlook.

I have wanted to do this for a long time. Rip apart everything and start fresh. Start the way I wanted to start in the first place.

The only difference? I realized it wasn’t too late.

I’ve been serious about getting published for five years. That is not a long time, but it’s a long time for such a terrifying commitment.

I went Indie, and I don’t regret anything about it. Self-publishing helped lead me to the path I have always wanted to be on.

I am now publishing a four book series with a traditional publisher. A publisher that I met at an event I went to as an Indie author.

I got tired of listening to the “traditional is better” spiel, and I honestly think that is why I turned to self-publishing. I wanted to carve out my own, as many people choose to do. But I have wanted this outcome for a long time. I trusted my gut and I have accomplished.

It’s been a long 2017, I’ve embarked on a publishing journey and now I’m on my second. I have stressed over everything along the way, but in the end everything is coming together.

Life isn’t perfect, but some of these paths we go down, they can lead us to who we are. Every night is a new dusk, a fresh start. Wake up with the dawn and chase that dream of yours. This is your life, stop saying you can’t reach that dream. Get off the couch, get out of the house, flee to the city, run to the mountains, jump to the ocean. You are only alive now, go.

Discovery: Part 3


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RIGHT HERE

Once ago I thought I knew myself. But that was years ago. I’m me. Though I’m not myself.

I see all this time passing by and I think I should be different. Think I need to conform. I clench my eyes shut to pass away the voice inside my head.

Dammit I can still hear it. It never goes away.

My conscience. Is that what it is? Maybe.

All the maybes they drown. Not my soul. They drown my sense.

I’ve done a lot of changing. I’ve transitioned into different stages. I watch the News. I see all these things happening. I listen everyday, what’s going to happen?

I see it all, right here. Right in this exact moment.

I look across a field, glancing between the blades of grass. I can see her. Running, prancing, falling in love with the spirit of life.

She’s sprinting, she doesn’t see the hole. She falls in lost.

She comes back again. Staring back at me. Right here, she looks me in the eyes.

Gone again she goes, rolling through the hills, running through airports, jumping out of planes, and falling from skyscrapers.

I see her once again.

Right here, in my reflection.

 

 

 

 

 

(Discovery:Part 3)